Sunday, November 28, 2010

They say you cannot run from your problems but I disagree. In-fact in those wild, spastic strides with the wind in your face and your heart pounding against your ribs you feel nothing, the most blissful emptiness you'll ever not feel. The more space you put between where you were and you're next step is riveting. It's like heroin.
and maybe you cannot out run them because you always have to turn back but at least when you do, you can take a god damn breath before you step into the tangled mess that is your life.

those who say you cannot run from your problems are simply not runners.


Tuesday, November 16, 2010

"The battles that count aren't the ones for gold medals. The struggles within yourself - the invisible, inevitable battles inside all of us - that's where it's at."

Jesse Owens

I rolled into the house like a category five hurricane. Spitting lightning and profanities.
I fiddled with socks as I let him in on my crazy. This is not how I planned my day at all. Everything I never told anybody just came out with Haines in my hands. and as I shut the door behind me a wave of humiliation came over me. I want to hide my head in dirt like an ostrich.
I want to push redo. I want to pinky promise to never mention my mini meltdown ever again but it doesn't work that way. not because I'm an adult, not because it's the grown up thing to do but because it;ll always be there.