When it rains it pours and opens doors and floods the floors we always thought would keep us dry.

I've slowly started to pack. First the artwork. I have an entire box full of paintings. My paintings. I flipped through them and I was content. For once I didn't pick apart every brush stroke. I stared at them stacked in that box and I felt proud.

They came from my mind and my hands. No one elses.


I adopted a dog today.

It's funny how seeing people die doesn't affect me. Infact, the only feeling I have is guilt for not feeling anything at all. But seeing all those dogs in those kennels with concrete floors hurt.

I kneeled down infront of A17 and stuck my fingers through the chain link gate. It was cold and I wondered how the concrete felt on his paws. He walked over and licked my fingertips. His eyes were dark and sad. A trip to the visiting area and twenty minutes later I was signing the paperwork.

On the 30th he and I will be in a new home.
I think I need that dog more than he needs me.